How the lack of sexual desire affects men

Although there is no homogeneous pattern in men with regard to sexual performance, there is no doubt that for the perception and self-confidence, the loss of sexual desire is very difficult for them to bear, which puts them in a situation of vulnerability, since we take it for granted that the sexual impulse must be greater in the male.
This is also part of the social conception of sexual roles, hence many jokes are made about the topic «men always think the same thing» or that they have to be «physically strong», hence they are more likely to frequent gyms, to give the kind of what is expected of them and even, some make the mistake of taking anabolic, with negative consequences on libido and fertility.

Are less but are affected more:

Losing interest in sex may not be as frequent for men as it is for women: it involves around 15% of men, and if we add other sexual dysfunctions, it would be 25% of men affected, but it is estimated that this figure could double in the group of women.
But when men lose interest in sex it conditions them more than women, since their masculinity is so tied to their sexuality that it is very threatening, which can lead them to a spiral of negative thoughts about their self-esteem, even the breakup of the couple or fall into addictions.
Loss of libido also makes men feel more dissatisfied with the rest of their lives and affects them more than women. Only 23% of men with loss of libido say that they still feel very happy with life in general compared to 46% of women, in men the consequence is much greater.

-Where the difference lies:

There is a cerebral dimorphism, according to the sex and it is widely accepted that there are cognitive, skills and emotional differences between both sexes, although they can be complementary. Women externalize their feelings, men tend to internalize and relativize them, have less capacity for empathy, although it can not be generalized, since there are exceptions, as in every rule.
Women are characterized by their capacity for expression, by communicating what they think and what they feel, and in men the attitude of silence and being parsimonious is predominant. The woman needs to talk about her conflicts, the man if he does, preferably will, when he has already resolved them, for having less verbal ability.
In sex, just as the woman gives more importance to the before and after the sexual act, the man is more focused on the moment of penetration and orgasm, which can lead to stage fright, with flaccidity in the erection. On an instinctive level, the man is more in contact with his sexual need, while the woman is more in contact with her affective need.

-Factors that underlie:

The causes of this problem vary from medical to psychological. Erectile dysfunction is one of the causes of loss of libido, although it is not the same, but when you experience, sooner or later is likely to feel the other as well, by simple avoidance of frustration, it must be borne in mind that it can be an early symptom of vascular problems.
Performance anxiety and a climax too soon. Nearly one in three men complains of premature ejaculation, which is usually the result of not having erections firm enough and lasting, usually by not having a sufficient free testosterone base, while one in five is worried and pressured by performance.
Stress and low self-esteem lead to loss of libido. Various medical conditions, whether hormonal or not, in other cases certain drugs frequently used, which is corrected by changing the drug, as well as a mood disorder, such as mild or major depression and also a bad relationship that blocks all desire and nullifies all passion.

-Diagnostic approach:

First of all, it is convenient to fill in an international questionnaire called AMSS (Ageing Male Symptoms Score), which is a validated scale of symptoms with 17 questions, ranging from mild to very serious, passing through intermediate levels.
In our case, to adapt it to our environment we have incorporated 10 more questions and that gives us a first approximation to the existing problem. there are others like the test: International Index of Erectile Function (IIEF). and if the case requires it we include the Goldberg anxiety and depression test.
Previously or simultaneously a complete analysis is requested to evaluate the masculine hormonal profile widely that includes, of course, a general biochemistry, to rule out concomitant diseases.
An in-depth anmnesis (clinical history) and a physical examination are then carried out, together with a measurement of the biometric parameters in order to carry out a diagnostic framing.

-How it is treated:

As it could not be otherwise our approach will be holistic, that is to say integral, since there are multifactorial aspects that influence the disease. generally hormonal and psychological and even the most diverse pathologies, consequently, we cannot apply a standard treatment, since each patient is special and it is that singular world that there is in each one of us towards where we will direct our therapeutic action.
On the other hand the professional support focused on the patient, is crucial, because as we know, the burden of anguish that manifest, is very large, for various reasons: it is still taboo for a man to talk about these issues, so they take time to consult and if they have already asked for help have received answers such as: nobody dies of it or it is better not to feel anything, because that way you do not suffer, to give 2 examples.
It should not be forgotten that it is not the same not to treat, since hypogonadism can be caused by a prolactinoma, with serious consequences, in the same way the hormonal alteration can fertilize the ground for other pathologies to develop such as osteoporosis that are worth examples.
Last but not least, it deserves special consideration the relationship of couple, it would be strange that a man whatever his sexual orientation does not seek coexistence (except in the case of mental illness or very introverted lack of social skills) and for this relationship to be harmonious sexual life is essential. So much so that very often it is the couples who take the first step.

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